Becoming a Mother - Pish to Posh

Becoming a Mother

Happy Mothers Day to all the Mom’s.

This is my 4th Mothers Day but my son is only three… now that is some tricky math!  Anyway- I have been celebrating on Mothers Day with my mother for 34 years… so this day is very special to me (as I am sure it is to many many people).  My mother has been the most influential, compassionate, warm-hearted, patient person in my life.  She has taught me what it is to feel loved and accepted.  She is forever and always on my side and I am truly blessed to call her “Woman” each and everyday! Thank you mom.

I am now a mother.  And I would still consider myself a new mother despite my son being three.  Some of you know and I have mentioned it in previous posts and on Instagram that the story of Declan’s first years of life are riddled with hardship, challenges, unexplainable bonds and a healthy dose of mom guilty but many, who may be new to Pish to Posh, do not know the full story.  And in fact there are friends I have had for years who do not know the complete story and depth of emotions that appeared when I became a mother on February 28, 2014.

And guess what????? This still is not that post.

I wanted to and I tried several times and for several days to write Declan’s birth story and to share what the first year was like as a new mother with a baby who spent 4+ weeks in the NICU, who was constantly in and out of the hospital, who had 4 different surgeries and who was completely helpless… but in the end I guess I am not ready to share it all.  I still need to keep it close to my heart, I want to continue to work through the negative emotions of guilt and I need to ensure I feel safe to share. I am not there yet.  But I am working on it.

I do feel safe, in this space, giving you a glimpse of the things I learned once I became a mother.  As a mother I have learned an enormous amount about myself and about how I want to live my life.  When I became responsible for another humans life and one that needed a bit more TLC than others I learned the valuable lesson of selflessness, I learned the importance of family and I learned who I can trust.  Over the last three years my life has been more full, more happy and more complete than I could have ever imagined. When I am with Declan I am the most happy, most content and most at peace then any other time.

Becoming a mother was always part of my plan in life but I never anticipated it would feel this way nor did I anticipate I would love being a mother this much.  I guess I thought it was just the next step in life but since I was given Declan as a child – with all his medical issues and all his toddlerness- it is much more than the next step in life… HE IS MY LIFE.

shop my look: Romper // block heels // necklace <similar> // sunnies
shop Declans look: shorts // button down // fedora // trainers 

 

19 thoughts on “Becoming a Mother

  • Reply Christin May 10, 2017 at 8:43 am

    I absolutely love this post. You are so real, so easy to connect with, and so stylish! Keep doing what you are doing, friend.

    • Reply pishtoposh May 10, 2017 at 3:18 pm

      Thanks- you are so sweet! I know you have some of your own experiences with NICU and I was so thankful for your support while we were there!
      A

  • Reply Claire May 10, 2017 at 9:12 am

    xoxo😘 Happy Mother’s Day!

    • Reply pishtoposh May 10, 2017 at 3:18 pm

      Thank you so much!
      A

  • Reply Ayana May 10, 2017 at 11:52 am

    That time when your baby is born is definitely very personal and intimate, I totally understand the trouble of sharing it! Especially if there were more hardships that went along with it. I can’t imagine! These photos are really beautiful and he is such a cute boy!

    • Reply pishtoposh May 10, 2017 at 3:19 pm

      Ayana- I want to share it to hopefully inspire others to remember they are strong and can do it!!! Hope to eventually be able to write it out.
      A

  • Reply Emily May 10, 2017 at 2:23 pm

    Nothing can truly prepare us for how motherhood will change us. Beautiful post. Love the romper 🙂

    • Reply pishtoposh May 10, 2017 at 3:20 pm

      That is so true!! Thanks for stopping by!
      A

  • Reply Corey | The Nostalgia Diaries May 10, 2017 at 2:30 pm

    Isn’t mommyhood amazing? You are beautiful and he is so handsome!

    • Reply pishtoposh May 10, 2017 at 3:20 pm

      Thanks Corey- it is amazing!!!
      A

  • Reply Victoria May 10, 2017 at 7:50 pm

    Happy Mothers Day fellow NICU Mama

    • Reply pishtoposh May 14, 2017 at 8:54 am

      And same to you Victoria! Happy Mothers Day.

  • Reply Jaime May 11, 2017 at 12:04 pm

    Awesome post and thank you for sharing. I still have not shared my birth story for my 20 month old son either… just too much emotion to put into words at this point. Happy early mother’s day to you though!

    • Reply pishtoposh May 14, 2017 at 8:55 am

      Jaime- I can appreciate the emotion- I so want to share more but I am not there yet! How do you work through those feelings???
      A

  • Reply Shannon | Mom Without Labels May 12, 2017 at 7:59 am

    1. You look fantastic.
    2. Your sweet boy is adorable!
    3. Motherhood really is the best teacher!

    • Reply pishtoposh May 14, 2017 at 8:56 am

      Shannon- you are so sweet. Thank you for such kind comments!
      A

  • Reply Angela Kim May 12, 2017 at 10:39 am

    Motherhood never comes easy for us, right? But i believe there are always reasons to our struggles, blessings that come after the pain. You and Declan are meant to be together in this world, just like me and my Declan! You two are beautiful

    • Reply pishtoposh May 14, 2017 at 8:57 am

      Thank you so much Angela- motherhood is not easy but you are right in the blessings it gives us!
      A

  • Reply Nicole May 15, 2017 at 11:44 am

    I hope you do write about this someday. Motherhood is so special and everyone has a different story. I hope you had a lovely Mother’s Day!

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