Second Chances: Little Black Dress

Second chances are not given to make things right. But are given to prove we can better after we fall

At this point in my life I am really trying to embrace the idea of second chances.  Not only for others but for MYSELF.  I am a pretty harsh critic of myself and when I mess up I am pretty unforgiving.  Allowing someone to change and giving them the opportunity to do so has been a great challenge for me despite my desire to forgive and move on.  The idea that second chances won’t take away the pain or make it better but to show that people (including myself) can make changes is a new one for me.  I always looked at second chances as an opportunity to right a wrong- or make amends for hurting someone- or demonstrate remorse… but the idea that I should use second chances to encourage and support growth is one I want to embrace more.

Over the last several months I have been very candid about my journey, both good and bag, in returning to Denver.  What I may not have been as candid about was the impact that has had on some of my friendships, relationships and marriage.  Over the last several years I have had so many experiences that have impacted me – Declans birth and first year, moving to London, starting the blog, moving back to Denver, my husband traveling all the time- that I am so much different than I was just 4 years ago.  Over that time I have let go of friendships that did not align with where I was in my life, that I felt were not supportive, or that I did not feel an organic relationship from… at the time I felt very good about those choices.  I was comfortable moving on with my life.  I was comfortable and happy exploring new friendships and relationships.  And while I am still very happy with those choices I am opening my heart to second chances.  Recently, I had drinks with a girlfriend and I was blown away by the change and acceptance I felt from her, I left feeling rejuvenated, I left happy with the decision to open my heart for a second chance.  A second chance for a friendship, a second chance for happiness and second chance for an authentic relationships.

I am a harsh critic of MYSELF.  I hold myself to standards that too often are unattainable so I am consistently letting myself down… and believe it or not this doesn’t seem to be working for me any longer.  Ha.  We all fail and we all fall down.  I am just not good at giving myself the second chance to do it again- I am not good and remembering there is growth in trying again.  Instead of granting myself forgiveness I hold a grudge against myself. Going forth I strive to allow myself to the second chance I deserve… growth is as important as the outcome.  Intentions speak louder than failures.

Photos: Jenna Sparks Photography

shop the look: dress <similar>  // sandals // tote // sunnies // necklace

So, I am not one to get dressed up very often but I do love dresses.  I found this beauty at Rack and have been loving it.  This particular dress sold out pretty quickly but I have found several that are similar. I love an easy casual black dress in the summer as they are perfect for lunch dates, date nights and everything in between.  I typically choose ones that are easy to wear (meaning comfortable and wearable about my toddler) and that have one or two elements of fun!  This one has a racer back and the gathered detail at the waist add a little definition to a classic simple LBD.  These sandals popped up on my Instagram and I am still loving them.  They are fun, comfortable and under $25.  I mean what else do you need in a summer sandal??? I have linked several other lace up sandals, below.

This Kate Spade was my summer bag purchase.  I debated for a while between several but in the end the scalloped detailing and the bright pink accents really sold this one for me. I love the summer feels and how big it is!!  I seem to be carrying a lot more in my bag these days, hmmmmm…. toddlers!

chances

With my new hope to allow myself and others second chance I can’t help but wonder what doors I may have closed by not offering a second chance.  Each day I am given another chance to offer myself an opportunity to pick up where I fell, to accept my failures and to try again.  In order for a second chance to work I have to allow the other person (or myself) the chance to change. If I always perceive them in a certain way I will never see anything different. It is up to me to open my hear, my mind and my life.  Second chances are hard… the fear of being hurt again, the fear of failure again or the fear of the unknown… but the possibility of authentic and organic relationships, personal growth and change are worth the chance.

With Love,

 

23 thoughts on “Second Chances: Little Black Dress

  • Reply Katie July 5, 2017 at 10:51 am

    You look beautiful <3 and you got this, girl!

    xo, Katie
    Willow and White

    • Reply pishtoposh July 8, 2017 at 11:05 am

      Thanks Katie!
      A

  • Reply Linda July 5, 2017 at 1:09 pm

    I’m probably my own worst critic. There’s nothing anyone can say to me that can be worse than the things I already say to myself. I, too, hold way too high expectations for myself. I think it’s important to surround yourself with people who love and accept you, and that’s what I’m trying to do. And it’s slowly working. It’s okay to not be a perfectionist sometimes. 🙂

    PS. Love the dress!

    Linda

    • Reply pishtoposh July 8, 2017 at 11:06 am

      Linda- I couldn’t agree more!! Sounds like you are on a good path!!
      A

  • Reply Delaney July 5, 2017 at 1:28 pm

    Great dress! I am going to need to add something like this into my closet soon and like you said I need something that is super comfortable.

    • Reply pishtoposh July 8, 2017 at 11:07 am

      Exactly!!! Comfort is always top priority.
      A

  • Reply Effie July 5, 2017 at 2:16 pm

    Cheers to authenticity in all you do and whom you surround yourself with! En route to DEN, hope to see you soon.

  • Reply Vivi July 5, 2017 at 2:30 pm

    Not even second chances, but third…fourth…fifth. I truly believe we all afforded multiple chances to regroup and start over. We put too much emphasis on ‘second chances’.

    Here’s to the next phase of your life.

    • Reply pishtoposh July 8, 2017 at 11:07 am

      So true… sometimes we just need that extra push and opportunity.
      A

  • Reply Shannon | Mom Without Labels July 5, 2017 at 3:03 pm

    You are such a beautiful soul, Amanda! It can be tough to open doors we closed once; sometimes it bites us and sometimes it’s beautiful. I hope your second chances are nothing but the latter. Love your look, too! xo

  • Reply Laura Mitbrodt July 5, 2017 at 6:51 pm

    Your dress is so cute, I love it with the sandals
    xo
    http://www.laurajaneatelier.com

  • Reply Nicole July 6, 2017 at 12:44 am

    I believe in keeping your heart open and I am glad you are giving yourself and others more room. Love the look too and always Kate Spade am I right!

  • Reply Ilse July 6, 2017 at 9:35 am

    Thanks for being so candid and open about your journey! It’s not easy that’s for sure!

    xo, Ilse
    http://www.livelearnluxeit.com

    • Reply pishtoposh July 8, 2017 at 11:08 am

      Thanks for the support Ilse!
      A

  • Reply Jenn July 9, 2017 at 5:48 am

    I’m the same way. Thank you writing this beautiful post for girls like me who struggle with this! 💕

    • Reply pishtoposh July 9, 2017 at 1:50 pm

      Sweet Jenn- It is a struggle for everyone. You are not alone and I am so glad you were able to connect with this. Have a great one!
      A

  • Reply Our Family World July 9, 2017 at 8:13 am

    Thank you for sharing your story. Giving ourselves a second chance (or more) is a good way to be a better person. However, this would not work well if someone wronged you and you keep giving them “second chances” in the hope that they’d treat you better next time. I’ve been down that route and felt abused. I said my piece, turned my back and gave my life a second chance to be the real person I should be.

  • Reply jen July 9, 2017 at 11:43 am

    I love how you styled this little black dress! Especially with your summer Kate Spade bag! The pink pop of colour would have sold it for me too!! I also really love that you realize you are super hard on yourself and are giving yourself second chances. This really struck for me since I am going through what seems to be a second chance in my life too. xo Jen

    • Reply pishtoposh July 9, 2017 at 1:49 pm

      Thank you so much Jen- It is a new thing for me but I am working to be a little nicer to myself.
      A

  • Reply Jessica Peresta July 9, 2017 at 12:04 pm

    I love your honesty. It is so refreshing to hear someone share their struggles with everyone else. Also…your sandals are amazing!

    • Reply pishtoposh July 9, 2017 at 1:48 pm

      Ahh thanks Jessica- my goal is to always try and connect with one person!
      A

  • Reply Janie August 4, 2017 at 10:19 am

    Second chances are a big thing, especially for yourself. I am learning that a great deal this year. I am also my harshest critic. You’re doing such an amazing job with the blog, and should definitely know that! You’re also beautiful, but that’s not a surprise.

    xoxo Janie

    • Reply pishtoposh August 4, 2017 at 1:58 pm

      Oh thank you so much Janie- such kind words and I can not tell you how much I appreciate them.
      A

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